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* Dogwood Blossoms -- Volume 1, Issue 6 -- February '94 *
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* editor: Gary Warner: (GLWARNER@SAMFORD.BITNET) *
* assistant editors: Matt Burke: (burke@beta.math.wsu.edu) *
* Nori Matsui: (NORIM@EARLHAM.BITNET) *
* special consultant: Gary Gach: (ggach@pandora.sf.ca.us) *
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Dogwood Blossoms, is an often-monthly 8-) publication of the
Internet community. The goal of this digest is to be a place
where Haiku can be shared and discussed with other lovers of the
art. Submissions are encouraged, both of original work,
published work by other authors, and comments and critiques of
works in previous issues. Articles of "short essay" length are
also welcome.
When you subscribe, please volunteer any haiku you would like to
see discussed, indicating if it is published or original...
also, if you would like to serve on the "editorial board" please
indicate so, or if you can serve as a translator for non-English
submissions (which are welcome) please indicate so.
If you are a list owner, and feel that this digest would make an
appropriate posting on your list, please send me a note
indicating so. In this issue:
I. Administrivia (you're there now!)
II. A note from the editor
III. Original Haiku by our subscribers
IV. Haiku from Logos -- Ryo Suzuki
V. A Winning Children's Haiku -- Rodrigo Siquiera
VI. Suprised by Haiku -- Gary Warner
VII. Commentary on Form -- Debbie Blohm
VIII. A Critique of Styles -- Bill Blohm
IX. A Conversation on Haiku Form -- Andreas Schoter/Bill Blohm
X. Contest Announcements
XI. Assignments for Future Issues . . .
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II. "A note from the Editor"
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Dogwood Blossoms took a holiday break, mostly because it seems
many of YOU took a holiday break, but also because frankly I've
been terribly busy between things that paid better (my job, and
contract work) and things I enjoy more (my children, and my wife).)
There are some format considerations being made, mostly aimed at
increasing circulation and SUBMISSIONS. I'll say it right up
front, in case some of you never make it to the bottom, DOGWOOD
BLOSSOMS NEEDS SUBMISSIONS TO SURVIVE! The next issue will be
out the first full week of March IF AND ONLY IF we get enough
submissions. Some considerations to increase submissions:
o should a print version of DB be made available to "paper"
mail subscribers? Unfortunately, this would have to
be at a cost, although I SWEAR DB will remain free on-line.
o DB needs to increase circulation to increase submissions.
PLEASE share DB with your English or Japanese professors,
print it and post it, give it to friends, anything that
you think might help.
o You don't NEED to have an email address to submit. Our
friend Bill Blohm is a perfect example. We receive
posts from his wife, Debbie, and even his sister. Rodrigo
Siquiera and Ryo Suzuki have also submitted posts on behalf
of pupils, friends and loved ones. Part of the goal of DB
is to publicize haiku. Print it and share it with friends
and family. If they want to send us something, submit for
them! It is more than welcome.
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III. "Original Haiku by Our Subscribers"
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(Gar-Note: Trying something a little different with this section,
let me know what you think...)
4) Gnarled oak
holds bare branches aloft
-awaiting spring
2) A leaf
Not the same on
My kitchen floor
4) fallen leaf
floating on wooded stream
swirls in an eddy
5) From the naked branch
a single yellowing leaf
hangs
8) leaf drifts slowly down
Father Time takes one more step
towards cold winter
1) Coasting, skimming ghosts.
Dense lake mist drifts to reveal
Canadian geese!
7) The ground hardened
By the first breath of autumn
Misting from my lips.
7) Headlights through the trees:
Beams of mist
On an autumn night.
3) lunar eclipse
my eyelids
drooping
9) lying on my back
the column of exhaled steam
rises to the moon
9) my gaze ascends the pine
to where its branches
embrace shrinking moon
3) lunar eclipse
frozen maple leaves
rattle
3) moment
of total eclipse
cramp in my neck
9) full moon
disappearing
in a cloudless sky
9) noone attending
my first moon-viewing party
but two barking dogs
4) Moth...
searching for the moon
finds my porch light
4) wolf tracks...
in the new-fallen snow
pass in the night
9) as my three-year old
tracks the great bear
I note its boot-tread
4) from the mountainside
the green valley
and seeing...for miles
9) distant city lights
the wilderness of daylight
not so wild now . . .
9) Sitting on Bald Rock
teaching my son to use
the eyes in his ears
4) in a notch
formed by nearby hills
the great mountain's peak
9) like the humps
of a terrible sea serpent
ridges in mountain-mist
7) Softened by morning mist -
the red flare
of reflected sunlight.
2) Chinese restaurant
Aluminum take-out tray
Recyclable -- gleams!
9) Reaching a crossing
Steam whistle accompanies
Silent moving lips
2) The train punches north.
Is the grass lush, or is it
The tinted window?
8) first love, first kisses
wonderful and frightening
over so quickly
6) so fast a heart
so delicate a chest
tiny bird
4) hawk soaring...
flaps his wings once
in the still air
9) until spring melting
we see each other no more
fisherman heron
6) fisherman's hand
nets
of her stockings
6) coming near me
the nude dancer's
spearmint
4) in the midst of war
death and destruction
-a butterfly
4) middle of a field
on a brown leafless stalk
a blue flower
1) Terry Asher
2) "Tom Frenkel"
3) Gene Doty
4) JONWOOD@delphi.com
5) Mykel Board
6) Chuck Easter
("fisherman's hand" and "so fast a heart" were
originally published in Modern Haiku)
7) Andreas Schoter
8) Debbie Blohm
9) Gary Warner
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IV. "Haiku from Logos" -- Ryo Suzuki
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(Gar-Note: Ryo has many young Haiku enthusiasts at the Logos
School, where he uses Haiku as a tool for teaching
English...Its a joy to see their work!)
year-end
on the kales
dewdrops Ryosuke Suzuki
afternoon sunlight
faint sound of
falling camellia Ikuko Sano
window
wiping to find
winter's face Ayako Tanaka
men in the cold wind
waiting for the shutter's click
the setting sun Mikiko Iida
caught a cold
for a week
still cold Yuri Takai
sunbathing
on winter river sandbars
two wild ducks Kikuko Kondo
The fading crescent
Sitting on a pine tree;
The nest of a snowy heron Yoshiko Ono
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V. "A Winning Children's Haiku" -- Rodrigo Siquiera
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Green little pumpkins
using their leaves as shelter
whenever it rains.
Jenny Hodson
11 Years
British Columbia, Canada
Judge's Comment: "At first, I though I would select a work that in some
way possesses the basic qualities of a pure haiku in its classical sense.
But after attending the children's haiku reading at Setoda, I think that
while the 5-7-5 syllable form has to be maintained, the contents should
correctly reflect the working of the children's minds and hearts in all
their innocent freshness and sincerity.
If there is an element of humor, then it should be in the spirit
of their age: direct, unpolished and mobilizing images from the worlds they
live in.
Children's haiku may constitute a momentary record of what they
witnessed, putting strong colors in some subtle nuance in others,
or in bold expressions whenever they wish to, or in soft impartial
whispers if they so prefer, of something that come up in their minds.
The theme "green" and "growing" also become a point of consideration,
not necessarily requiring explicit stress.
With the above consideration in mind - and in no way lessening my
admiration for the other 290 haiku in the list - I decided to choose
this haiku as one of the best with regrets for not being allowed to
select a dozen more good ones."
Soekarno Hadian.
Historian, Indonesia.
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VI. "Surprised by Nature -- Gary Warner
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Of the many haiku that I have enjoyed, I find myself particularly
drawn to haiku with a dramatic conclusion. Often this is a haiku
which when read has a clear pause just before the final phrase,
which gives the "explanation" needed to make the previous phrases
meaningful:
Too curious flowers
Watching us pass, met death...
Our hungry donkey
-- Basho
But another type of drama in haiku is what I like to call
"Surprised by Nature" haiku. I have selected four haiku which
illustrate this point taken from across the history of haiku.
When people are trying to find a subject for a haiku, I would
encourage you to look for these surprises of nature.
From among the oldest haiku, we begin with Matsuo Basho, who is
credited as the first great master of haiku. Here are two examples
of surprises he found. The first is taken from a journey he
made through the Yamato province, when he was stopping for
the evening in the town of Tamba-ichi:
Kutabire-te I came weary,
Yado karu koro ya seeking an inn--when lo!
Fuji-no-hana Wistaria flowers
Part of what made Basho such a great poet was his keen observation.
Those of us who struggle to find a subject are perhaps going about
things the wrong way. Basho merely wrote about the things he
experienced, although he took time to put himself in situations to
experience nature. Here Basho is taken by surprise by the beautiful
Wisteria, which have the lovely name "flowers of Mt. fuji" in his
original poem.
The second was composed at the village of Saga, near Kyoto.
Hototogisu A cuckoo has cried
O-takeyabu wo Lo! the moon gleams through
Moru tsukiyo a great grove of bamboos
Although I do not know the details of its composition, my imagination
suggests that perhaps the cuckoo has awakened the master, and being
so aroused, he looks out his window, and observes the moon shining
through the silhouetted bamboo. Even if he was out walking when this
happened, do you see the surprise? He hears the cuckoo, and upon
looking for it, he finds the beauty of the moon beams.
(Both of the above translations are from the incomparable work of
Asataro Miyamori).
Takahama Kyoshi can also be observed to use such a technique in the
poem below. Kyoshi was a favored disciple of Shiki, considered also
one of the four great masters, living from 1874-1959. He is most
noted for his founding of the magazine Hototogisu, which was founded
under Shiki's tutelage, where he served as editor for many years.
(Translation taken from _The Haiku Handbook_ by William Higginson)
ame harete rain cleared --
shibaraku bara no for a while, the wild rose's
nioi kana fragrance
There are many opportunities for nature's surprises in change. When
there is a change in the weather, as illustrated above, or when there
is a change of lighting, as illustrated by James Hackett below, in
this poem taken from _The Way of Haiku_.
The sunset fading
I turn around toward home. . .
a huge, saffron moon!
What a wondrous treat! To be sitting, observing the sunset, and
just when you feel that nature has completed its show for your
pleasure, to turn and discover that the second act has just begun!
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VII. "Commentary on Form -- Debbie Blohm
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I look at Haiku the same way I look at other forms of art. I
find beauty in simplicity. Simple lines and curves. I prefer
art with few or no "rules".
As far as I am concerned, there are only 2 rules to writing
Haiku- #1, it must have 17 syllables and #2, it must follow the
5-7-5 pattern.
A haiku should not be a struggle to write or a struggle to read.
The meaning should flow easily from writer to reader.
My point is that by criticizing and searching for broken rules we
sometimes so complicate the Haiku in our own minds that we miss
the beauty or emotion that the writer was trying to convey.
Sometimes we need to sit back, relax, and enjoy the art presented
to us.
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VIII. "A Critique of Styles -- Bill Blohm
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I am by no means a Haiku expert. I volunteered to try to provide
some critique on assignment 1b from issue 4. As a result, please
remember that the following critiques are entirely my own opinion,
howsoever qualified it be.
Regarding the submission by "name-withheld-by-request":
The brief one can not stand on it's own. A haiku should be
enjoyable when read by itself. The "normal" one, put on a page
by itself and handed to someone would create a scene of a raging
storm causing a flood in the midst of winter. One scene, several
locations depending on the preference of the reader. But one
scene. However, now put the brief version on a page by itself
and have someone read it. Many scenes are possible with none
suggesting the original. The closest one might come is a storm
via the "crash" of thunder. Yet most people would probably come
up with an automobile accident. "Crash!" is either a verb or a
noun. And as a verb it implies a dramatic crash of two things.
As a noun, it implies a sound, as of some two things crashing
into each other. Either way, the scene of a storm in winter is
lost. Perhaps better would have been something along the lines
of:
Thunder, flood ...
No gentle snow.
As to the original Haiku, the last line is simply a repeat of the
first two and could more effectively been used to specify a
locale instead. For example, "high desert canyon". The image is
there, but a little wide open. With this change the short
version could become something like:
Thunder, flood ...
No gentle canyon snow.
Regarding the submission by Tom Frenkel:
The brief version could have been reduced even further. As it
is, each line is but a syllable shorter. An even shorter version
would be achieved by a re-write rather than a re-wording.
Perhaps something like:
From dentist's chair
pigeon wheelies.
Both original and brief versions seem somewhat artificial and a
little awkward to read. Wheelies gives a picture of a car taking
off on two wheels. How does this apply to a bird? This may have
a local definition, but all I can think of is circling and my
experience with pigeons contradicts this. So for me it is a
difficult haiku to read. Also, Tom has a heavy pause at the end
of the first line, too, instead of flowing smoothly and this is
carried over into the brief version. Either could stand on it's
own, but the brief one is so slightly changed that it begs
"repair" to become a true 5-7-5 haiku rather than actually
becoming a brief version standing separate from the original.
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IX. "A Conversation on Haiku Form -- Schoter/Blohm
*****************************************************************
(Gar-Note: Andreas Schoter and Bill Blohm
have been engaged in a lively
discussion regarding the question of form and specifically
syllable counting which was a topic of issues 4 and 5 of Dogwood
Blossoms. I asked that the conversation be edited into a
printable form, and Andreas has done so, with assistance and
advice from Bill. I hope sharing this conversation will
encourage you to experiment with your OWN haiku forms, as well as
perhaps prompting you to write a response either to the
participants, or to DB.)
The Conversation
----------------
AS
==
Bill, in reading through the recent issue of "Dogwood Blossoms" (Issue
4) I was astounded by your claim that: "it is the form that is defined
by the term 'haiku' and not the contents of the haiku" - surely this
must be a rhetorical device on your part?
One of the supposed strictures on "classical" haiku was that they
contain a season word - this surely counts as 'content' and not
'form'. Also, if haiku is merely the form of the poem and not its
content then why does classical Japanese literature distinguish
between haiku and senryu? The only difference between them is
content: the former is _about_ nature and contains a season word,
whilst the latter is _about_ human relationships (roughly). These are
distinctions of pure content and not form.
I'd be interested in your opinion on this matter; are you such a rigid
formalist as your remark would lead me to believe?
BB
==
First, allow me to clarify something. When I learned about haiku I was
taught basically that it was a Japanese poetical form of 5-7-5
syllables, on the respective lines and was most usually intended to
provide the reader with a picture of a scene, preferably also letting
the reader know the authors' feeling(s) about that scene. I was never
taught that a seasonal aspect was considered a part of it, as was
mentioned in your e-mail and Ryosuke Suzuki's article in the same issue
of Dogwood Blossoms as mine was in (Issue 4).
I disagree with Ryosuke about 17 syllables being too long in English.
To me, the 5 syllable, 7 syllable, 5 syllable form is the framework in
which the haiku must be constructed. The contents, for me, do not
define the haiku. By my lights, a haiku must contain 5-7-5 syllables
on the correct lines, but may be about anything.
While I strongly believe this, I am quite aware that a haiku written
in, for example, Japanese, would be a 5-7-5 form in Japanese but when
translated into English so that I could enjoy it, it might not contain a
5-7-5 format. I simply meant to say that the format is a valid
restriction for the author in his native language, whether or no it
translated with that format of 5-7-5. I do not believe that the haiku
written in another language should be translated such that it retains
the 5-7-5 format in the language translated into. Rather, the image,
emotion, and thought of the author should be ideally represented, with
all who read it hopefully realizing that this is but an attempted
translation of the writer's haiku. A perfect example would be the
haiku by Nori in the same issue (issue 4). I am sure that in his or her
native language, it meets the 5-7-5 constraint even though it does not
in English. Far rather would I have the translation that is provided
and assume that it was the closest possible representation of that
haiku so that I could enjoy and appreciate his efforts.
Senryu was entirely new to me. I have seen the word, but this is the
first I have been told that it is the same as a haiku except for the
content. Until you pointed out the difference, had I been shown one of
each and asked, I would have replied that if, in the original author's
language of choice, they were written in the 5-7-5 framework, they were
both haiku. I would not have known that they had specific labels to
differentiate them.
Further, I confess that just as I do not always appreciate free-form
haiku, I also do not appreciate free-form poetry in general. Granted,
there are poets (including of haiku) who do work with and effectively
utilize the free-form style. But there are far too many out there who
use the free-form style as an excuse for not following the more
difficult, stricter requirements for writing a structured poem or
haiku. For many of these, where did the author put any effort into the
writing? I see nothing to indicate that he worked on it, I feel
cheated as if he is not allowing me to see a little of what is being
said means to him through his poetry.
As a matter of fact, your query begs the question of me: If haiku must
contain a seasonal word and be about nature and senryu must be about
human relationships...then what is a poem written in 5-7-5 about a boat
to be called? What about one about mountains, just describing a scene,
no "seasonal" words included? Or, to use something I really enjoy
writing about...what is a properly structured 5-7-5 haiku about the
lapping of the stream against the hull of my canoe to be called? (I
have just submitted such a haiku to Dogwood Blossoms.) To me, it is in
the correct form to be properly called a haiku.
I do not consider myself to be a "rigid formalist" as I apparently led
you to believe. It is just that to me, given what I knew, the 5-7-5
structure of the haiku was the only rule it had. Discard that and what
have you? Hence, my saying that the form defined the haiku.
AS
==
Bill, your reply did clear up some points, but I have a few things more
to say based on your message...
You note that one aspect that you were taught about haiku was that they
should preferably also let the reader know the authors feeling(s) about
that scene. This is quite interesting as in many classical haiku the
author is completely absent - there's a kind of detached quality about
the observation; although nonetheless feelings are often apparent. Much
is made of the Zen connection in haiku, where personality is to be
sublimated.
BB
==
Perhaps here I was not quite as clear as I meant to be. What I was
getting at is not putting across my feelings about the scene so much as
trying to select words, etc. that would flat out describe the scene so
that the reader does not have to grope for the picture. Yet at the
same time, I feel the author should try to evoke the same or a similar
empathic feeling in the reader. For example, to use my canoe haiku in
the last issue of Dogwood Blossoms (Issue 5): I wanted to paint in the
reader's mind a very specific picture of an early morning bit of
canoeing. Dawn, the mists rising off the quiet lake, gently paddling
along enjoying greeting the morning. Yet at the same time I wanted to
put across a feeling of serenity, perhaps of awe and joy at the coming
day. Now, I do not put any emotional words in this haiku. Yet I would
hope that the picture evoked is powerful enough to give a feeling of
quiet, serenity. The awe and joyous feelings would perhaps only be
evoked by someone who has been in a similar place at a similar time and
enjoys such moments. Perhaps I am still not quite getting across what I
am trying to say. I had a fleeting thought that would have perfectly
explained it (I think) but lost it in the typing. Perhaps what I mean
is that I want to present a picture, a scene in such a way that the
reader sees it in the same way I do and to guide his view such that
perhaps he feels the same way I did but without saying outright how I
felt.
AS
==
Sure, right. I guess I was worried that you might have been leaning
towards an overt statement of authorial involvement. Actually saying "I
thought it so serene" probably will not make your reader feel that the
experience was serene. Saying something about water lapping gently at
the hull probably will make the reader feel serene. Invoking feeling
without spelling it out is part of the art. I have a friend and Tai Chi
companion who does a great deal of canoeing, this summer he spent a month
in Canada on the water and your haiku captures some of the feeling that
I've got from talking with him about these things. However, I suspect
that even if I didn't have this background I'd still find it evocative.
BB
==
What about one about mountains, just describing a scene, no "seasonal"
words included?
AS
==
No problems here at all! Mountains are part of nature, and I for one
don't demand the inclusion of season words (if I'm remembering rightly,
many contemporary Japanese writers also omit them).
BB
==
On this we agree. If a seasonal word helps set the scene, use it, but I
do not require them to define a haiku as such either.
AS
==
Going back to Ryosuke's point about 17 syllables being too long in
English, I'm afraid that I too tend to think of 17 syllables as _often_
being too long. If you're keen to have a structure try experimenting
with 4-6-4 or even 3-5-3 counts: these can be very effective and are
closer to the original Japanese length.
BB
==
Closer to the original Japanese length? I thought the original Japanese
traditional length was 5-7-5. In Japanese.
AS
==
The thing is that Japanese "syllables" are much more uniform than their
English equivalents. Compare "moon" with the first syllable in
"minimal". The latter word has 3 syllables. but you can say it in
almost the same time that it takes to say the monosyllabic "moon". As I
understand Japanese, their "onji" (equiv. syllable) are all of a much
more uniform length than English syllables and tending to be of the
shorter syllable type. So, when I say that 17 syllables in English is
longer than the Japanese I mean that it would seem longer if you heard
17 syllables of English read out followed by 17 syllables of Japanese.
This is, by the way, largely 2nd hand, although from listening to the
Japanese speakers in my department I'd be inclined to say that it's
true.
BB
==
I have tried experimenting with similarly structured poems, but since my
definition of haiku included the 5-7-5 framework I did not consider them
to be haiku. I still do not, having at the moment no proof to the
contrary about the 5-7-5 framework. And I do not consider them
free-form variations either.
AS
==
Well, 4-6-4 does seem to be a quite commonly accepted variation in
English now by those people who insist on a structural constraint.
[See End Note 1]
But let's back up a bit and talk about the role of content. You say
that for you, the contents do not define the haiku. But for me, content
and brevity are The defining qualities. Even some classical Japanese
haiku do not stick to the strict 5-7-5 format yet no one has any problems
calling them haiku.
BB
==
I agree on the brevity. A haiku worded just to meet the 5-7-5 by the
inclusion of "the", "in", "a", etc. I do not consider a good haiku.
There were some examples of this in the last Dogwood Blossoms issue.
Although they appear to meet my requirements, yet they seem artificially
padded to do so.
AS
==
Equally I have to say that poems that leave out determiners to get the
count _down_ to 17 sylls are on dangerous ground too: they often sound
like they're written by someone who can't speak English properly!
Determiners such as "the" and "a" and prepositions like "in" are very
important parts of the English language and they convey significant
semantic information. Certainly they can be left out to good effect,
but you have to very careful. One of the properties often associated
with haiku is that they use "natural" language, not some artificial
poetic dialect. [See End Note 2]
BB
==
OK, but let's consider free-form poetry for a while. There have always
been people who prefer free-form poetry and working with it. If the
person knows what he is doing, and is good at it, and it is obvious what
type of poem he is trying to free-form in, then more power to him. I
have no problem with this. My problem is with the multitude who write
what they call free-form and try to pass it off as such. The majority
do not seem to have the discipline required to so write.
AS
==
Let me turn this one around:
My problem is with the multitude who write what they call structured
haiku and try to pass it off as such. The majority do not seem to
have the focused perception and clarity of mind required to so write.
I think that often the original spark that created the impetus to
write the haiku is lost by reworking. I think it's better to stop
early even if the form is not perfect and retain the moment rather
than get a perfect form and loose the moment. One's clarity of
perception is more likely to be reinforced by having output that
captures the moment - getting the form better can come with practice;
the _point_ of haiku has to be the communication of a moment of
experiance.
BB
==
I have myself tried free-form work, but did not like my results. If I
ever should satisfy myself enough to let someone else critique such,
then I might make such experimentation available to others to read.
However, I have not reached that point yet, and my personal observation
is that too many out there do not _try_ to exercise such discipline.
If I were a well-known haiku artist, then perhaps I could put out a
free-form poem that was marginally acceptable to me and my readers would
accept it as a free-form haiku because I am known for working in haiku.
AS
==
But there's a lot of ground between 5-7-5 and absolute free-form, in
fact, on one level I'd argue that there is no such thing as absolute
free-form in poetry.
BB
==
But there are far too many out there who use the free-form style as an
excuse for not following the more difficult, stricter requirements for
writing a structured poem or haiku.
AS
==
For sure - there's dross in every aspect of every movement. But there's
also such a thing as overworking a poem, or distorting its natural
expression to fit a pre-conceived idea of "form" - this is a real
divergence from the spirit of haiku for me.
BB
==
I agree it is divergance from the spirit of haiku to distort a natural
expression. Yet, is it not the artist's job to represent it in a
natural way? To seek out the words, the flow that fit inside the
framework? It is a rare circumstance, I think, that will not come to
meld into the framework being used. True, some require much thought and
word fitting, yet, is not this part of the joy of creating a masterful
haiku? And the rare times when the framework simply can not be used,
then and only then should free-form be attempted. (My opinion, of
course.) And by the time you get to this point, you should have the
experience and discipline to create a haiku outside the framework that
still should be called a haiku. Myself, I have yet to meet a situation
that would not fit in the 5-7-5, and so have not the need, experience,
nor discipline to trust my attempts at free-form and justify it being
called a haiku.
It is just that to me, given what I knew, the 5-7-5 structure of the
haiku was the only rule it had. Discard that and what have you?
AS
==
Discard that and you open up a whole realm of possibilities...
BB
==
And of chaos.
AS
==
No! Language has it's own structure independent of any poetic
impositions. Abandoning 5-7-5 doesn't take you to chaos, it takes back
towards the natural structure of the language itself. English has a
very rich structure with all sorts of markers in it: relative clauses
make neat subsections, the subject-predicate division can often be used
very effectively, the verb-object division too, although this is usually
weighted heavily on the object that can be an interesting point of
balance. There's lots of scope for playing with structure in the
language itself without having to add extra constraints.
I must admit to slightly playing devil's advocate here. Often my own
haiku are 5-7-5, and yes, there is something pleasing about shaping an
expression gently into a predefined shape, but I really think taking
that as the defining aspect of a haiku seems to be missing the point.
BB
==
No, I think it is the whole point. It appears to me that the whole
point of a haiku is to use a pre-defined shape. The point you are
apparently attributing to the definition of a haiku is the art of
creating the haiku. The two are to me distinct. To me, a haiku is 5-7-5
and any expression expressed is valid as long as it is not so abstract
that the general reader can not grasp it. Traditionally the expression
is a scene but that is not a defining aspect for me. It is how I
learned it, but I have written a few that do not present a scene so much
as express a feeling about the scene.
AS
==
No, I have to say again: the point of haiku is to communicate an instant
of experiance or perception in such a way as to evoke that for the
reader. Poems that adhere to the 5-7-5 form that do not do this are
_not_ haiku, they are simply poems that happen to have a 5-7-5 syll.
structure.
Epilogue
--------
Although the dialogue ends here this is merely an historical accident,
no doubt Bill will have more to say soon and readers should not assume
that this is the end of the debate. What is most interesting here to
both participants in the debate is the breadth of expression and form
available in the form of haiku. Both participants intend to continue
this exploration of the issues and questions raised.
END NOTES
=========
1. In the most recent issue of "Blythe Spirit" the Journal of the
British Haiku Society (Volume 3, Number 4), William Higgison (of "Haiku
Handbook" fame) writes an article called "Symmetry and Asymmetry in
Haiku Form" where he advocates "Striving to form your poem into three
lines, with two, three and two accented beats"
2. In Volume 3, Number 3 of "Blythe Spirit" Higginson writes an article
entitled "A Sense of the Language" where he laments the use of such
language calling it "telegraphese".
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X. Contest Announcements
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International Haiku Contest 1994
For the 300th anniversary of Matsuo Basho's death, Haiku
International Association will hold a commemorative international
haiku contest to honour the memory of this foremost poet of
Japan (1644 - 1694)
Guidelines
(1) No entry fee
Languages: Chinese, English, French, German, Italian, Japanese
or Spanish. In the case of other languages,
translation in one of those 7 should accompany it.
Form: 5-7-5 syllable form and season word are not essential.
(2) No limitation on age or sex or nationality. We welcome haiku
from all over the world. Please send us your haiku and ask your
friends to contribute their entries also. We welcome entries
from educational associations and institutions also.
(3) One to five haiku per person, previously unpublished No Foreword
or subject
(4) Each haiku to be on a postcard (or on paper the same size as
a postcard)
Name and address to be written on the reverse side of EACH post-
card or the said paper.
Please type, or print in clear block letters.
(5) Deadline: 28 FEB 1994 Entries are open now.
(6) Please send your haiku to:
"Contest Committee"
Haiku International Association
c/o P.O.B. 257
Tokyo 100-91, JAPAN
(7) The haiku entered will not be returned. Copyright belongs
to the author, provided that H.I.A. will have the right to
publish it in its publications.
(8) The winners will be judged by Haiku International Association.
Foreign Affairs Minister's Prize
President of Haiku International Association Prize
Honorable Mentions
Winners will be published in a Special Issue of Haiku International
with translations.
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The Fourth Annual Haiku Contest
Theme: Youth
We are pleased to announce the 4th Annual HAIKU CONTEST as a
part of the 8th Annual SAKURA FESTIVAL. "Youth"has been
decided as the theme for this year's Haiku Contest.
The contest is open to persons of any age living in Alabama
and to friends of Alabama living in Japan. Awards will be
presented to the 1st, 2nd, 3rd, and 4th prize winners of the
following four categories in both English and Japanese:
Elementary School Students (Grades 1-3)
Elementary School Students (Grades 4-6)
Junior and Senior High School Students
Adults
The winning entries will be published in an attractive booklet
and will receive cash prizes. The haiku must have 17 syllables,
which are distributed in 3 lines of 5-7-5 syllables, respectively.
It must present at least two images; the use of a seasonal element
is optional.
Rules 1) The entries must be an original creation
2) One can submit up to three haiku
3) The haiku must be written in Japanese or English
Please specify the category, including your name, social security
number, address, phone number, and age (students must include the
name of school and grade), and send your entry to:
HAIKU CONTEST
UA Japan Program
P.O. Box 870254
Tuscaloosa, AL 35487-0254
Deadline: March 1, 1994
Announcement of Winners: April 9, 1994 at "MATSURI IN THE MALL"
Judge: Dr. Eiji Sekine, Professor of Japanese Language and Literature
at Purdue University
For more information, please contact
The University of Alabama, Japan Program:
Phone: (205) 348-5312
Fax: (205) 348-5298
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XI. Assignments for Future Issues
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Thanks to all who submitted things for this issue! I have given
up predicting what will be in the next issue, as that depends
on YOU! Please consider submitting as a result of one of the
following assignments, but we ALWAYS NEED ORIGINAL HAIKU!!!
Assignments:
1. Original work. All submissions are welcome, to be included in
a future issue. Haiku, or articles about haiku are always
welcome. WE ARE DESPERATE FOR ORIGINAL HAIKU!!!!! Actually
we are also desperate for articles, book reviews, and anything
else you would like to share...
2. Published work. Find a Haiku collection at your library, and
share with us some particularly striking works you find. If
you would like, find several by a single author, or several
on a single theme and send them together for a special section.
3. Book reviews and recommendations are desired. If you submit,
please include the ISBN of the book, and ordering information
if known. Catalog information from Haiku presses is also
desired.
4. Contest news. We would like to let our readers know about
upcoming contests, as well as hear about contests in which
you have participated. Send us entry information, or tell
us about the turn out of the contest, and perhaps your entry
or the winning entries (if allowed). Thanks for the idea
Rodrigo!
5. If you own, work for, represent, or participate in any Haiku
organization, we will gladly advertise for you for a reciprocal
ad. Mention us in your publication or newsletter and we will
happily do the same for you. To make this seem a LITTLE less
than blatant advertising, please write a short article about
some event your organization has sponsored, or include sample
poetry from your organization's publication in your article.
(Dogwood Blossoms is Free to all...my note in section II about
refunds was a joke).
6. Send us a short note, telling what you thought of issue 6, or
responding to any of the Haiku that were included in this issue.
Encourage our contributors! (That's why we include their e-mail
addresses!) Let them know what you thought of their submissions
(and to me, I'm dying for feedback to share with my editorial
staff)
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